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Bidets are better at cleaning your butt than toilet paper, and they lower your risk of developing butt-itch or hemorrhoids. But unless you have the space (or money) for a full-sized bidet, you'll have to go for an add-on bidet.

Lucky for you, add-on bidets work pretty well. They're also relatively cheap and easy to install (if you can unscrew a seat from a toilet, then you can install a bidet). But the market is flooded with add-on bidets, many of which are almost identical to one another. That's why we've taken the time to find the best bidets and to explain why they may or may not suit your needs.

What to Look for in a Bidet Add-On

As strange as it sounds, bidets are sold with a variety of features, like temperature controls and aimable nozzles. Some add-on bidets even have built-in seat warmers or butt dryers. These extra features tend to cost extra money, so it's important to know what you want from a bidet before you take out your wallet and buy whatever looks cool. Bidets can look cool, right?

Here are the features that you should look for in a bidet add-on:

  • Retractable or Static Nozzle: Cheap bidets have static, unmoving nozzles that sit at the back of your toilet bowl. They aren't as effective as bidets with retractable nozzles, which can aim the water directly under your butt. (Of course, motorized bidets need to be plugged in or powered by batteries.) Some people swear by retractable nozzles, but static nozzles will still do a better job than toilet paper.
  • Under-Seat or Full-Seat Installation: There are two types of bidet attachments. One type sits under your existing toilet seat, while the other is a toilet seat replacement. Generally, full toilet seat bidets work better than under-seat attachments, as they're a bit more stable and they won't make your seat feel uneven. But, under-seat bidets are nice and cheap, and they do work.
  • Spray Options: Most bidets have pressure controls. But if you want a bit more from your bidet, then you should look out for temperature and nozzle aiming controls. Temperature controls are great if you live somewhere that gets extremely cold (nobody wants frozen water shot up their spine), but they're usually considered a luxury.
  • Extra Stuff: If you're willing to spend more than $100 on a bidet attachment, then you may as well consider buying a smart toilet seat. They don't connect to your phone or anything, but they have useful features like built-in butt dryers, night lights, and seat warmers. Some even deodorize and sanitize the toilet once you're finished doin' your business.

Alright, now that you know what to look for in a bidet, it's time to go shopping. Here are the best bidets for everybody's needs.

(By the way, you don't have to worry about "filtered" bidets or anything like that. When installing a bidet, you use a T adapter to split the potable water line that feeds into your toilet tank. In other words, the water that's used by your bidet is the same water that's used by your kitchen sink or shower. It isn't water from the toilet tank.)

The Best Overall: BioBidet Slim Zero

The BioBidet Slim Zero
BioBidet

The BioBidet Slim Zero is a no-nonsense toilet seat bidet that, when compared to other bidets, looks relatively "normal." Most add-on bidets have control panels like the chairs in Star Trek, but the Slim Zero is fitted with a simple and attractive knob instead. This knob activates the bidet and allows you to adjust its pressure, and it's reasonably easy to reach while sitting (just don't let your guests confuse it for the flush knob).

But the Slim Zero isn't all looks. It has a retractable nozzle that runs on two AA batteries. Remember, retractable nozzles are better at cleaning your tooshie than static nozzles. These batteries also power the Slim Zero's optional nightlight, which is a nice touch for the midnight-poopers out there.

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Bio Bidet by Bemis Slim Zero Bidet Toilet Seat, Elongated, White
The Best Overall

The BioBidet Slim Zero is an attractive, no-nonsense bidet. It replaces your toilet seat, has a retractable nozzle, and ditches the plastic control-panel in favor of a bidet knob.

The Best Budget Option: LUXE Bidet Neo 120

The LUXE Bidet Neo 120
LUXE Bidet

If you're looking for a cheap and effective add-on bidet, then you ought to check out the LUXE Bidet Neo 120. It's a good looking under-seat attachment with easy water pressure controls. Its static nozzles are good at spraying up at your butt, and it even has a "self-cleaning" function in case your nozzles get dirty.

For around $30, you really can't go wrong here. Sure, this bidet doesn't have a built-in water heater or a retractable nozzle, but it cleans your butt better than toilet paper. Better hygiene is a luxury, even if it doesn't come with a lot of frills.

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LUXE Bidet NEO 120 - Self-Cleaning Nozzle, Fresh Water Non-Electric Bidet Attachment for Toilet Seat, Adjustable Water Pressure, Rear Wash (Blue)
The Best Budget Option

The LUXE Bidet Neo 120 is inexpensive, attractive, and effective. It has adjustable pressure and self-cleaning nozzles---what more could you ask for?

The Premium Pick: BioBidet Bliss BB2000

The BioBidet Bliss BB2000
BioBidet

The BioBidet Bliss BB2000 is the Cadillac of add-on bidets. It takes the idea of a smart toilet seat to a whole new level. As a bidet, it's great. It has a retractable, aim-able nozzle that shoots out temperature-controlled water. It can also oscillate and pulsate water on your tush for maximum cleaning action, and it has a built-in butt dryer.

The BB2000's extra features are also impressive---perhaps to the point of absurdity. It has a seat warmer, a night light, a deodorizer, a slow-closing seat, self-cleaning functions, and a built-in touch screen. It also comes with a remote control (sort of the like the remotes that they stick on massage chairs), so you can dial in your toilet preferences with the push of a button. It really is a luxurious bidet attachment.

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Bio Bidet Bliss BB2000 Elongated White Smart Toilet Seat, Premier Class, Unlimited Warm Water, Vortex Wash, Bidet Seat w /Remote Control
The Premium Pick
$494 $699 Save $205

The BioBidet Bliss BB2000 takes add-on bidets to a whole new level. Its adjustable nozzle and temperature controls are great, and its luxury features and controls are unmatched.

Temperature Controls on a Budget: BioBidet BB-270

BioBidet BB-270
BioBidet

Most budget-bidets (and even some expensive bidets) run on cold water, which isn't great if you live in a cold environment. So, if you're looking for a temperature-controlled bidet that won't break the bank, then you should aim your sights at the BioBidet BB-270.

The BB-270 is very similar to the LUXE Bidet NEO 120. It fits under your toilet seat, it has static nozzles, and it has controls for water pressure and nozzle-cleaning. The only difference is that the BB-270 has a water temperature knob. And since it pulls hot water from your hot water supply, it doesn't need to be powered by batteries or a cable.

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Bio Bidet BB-270 Hot & Cold Freshwater Spray, Non-Electric, Bidet Attachment For Toilet Seat, Posterior & Feminine Wash, Easy Install, White
Temperature Controls on a Budget
$23 $79 Save $56

The BioBidet BB-270 is one of the few "budget" bidets that works with warm water. It doesn't run on electricity, and it has knobs for water pressure and nozzle cleaning.

Add Smart Features to Your Toilet: TOTO WASHLET

The TOTO Washlet
TOTO

TOTO is Japan's leading toilet brand, and the company is responsible for most toilet innovations that exist today---including the attachable bidet. So it's no surprise that the TOTO WASHLET is one of the best bidet add-ons that money can buy.

Think of the WASHLET as a smart toilet seat. You plug it into a wall, attach it to your toilet, and enjoy its amenities. It has a retractable nozzle that can be aimed from the control panel, adjustable water temperature, and even a built-in blow dryer for your butt. It also has a heated seat, self-cleaning features (like a pre-mist in the toilet bowl), and an automatic air deodorizer.

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TOTO SW2034#01 C100 Electronic Bidet Toilet Cleansing Water, Heated Seat, Deodorizer, Warm Air Dryer, and PREMIST, Elongated, Cotton White
Add Smart Features to Your Toilet

The TOTO WASHLET is basically a smart toilet seat. Alongside robust bidet features and a built-in butt dryer, it has deodorizing, self-cleaning, and seat warming features.