Brookstone was a good gadget store, and a good nerd. It was one of us. It was a store that loved massage chairs… and useless gadgets. As a novelty mall shop, it carried light up football speakers, AR laser tag, and flying tanks. Brookstone died.
It died, like so many young retail establishments of its generation, before its time. In your wisdom, Bankruptcy, you took it and closed all of its mall stores. As you took so many bright, flowering young retail stores, like H.H. Gregg, The Limited, and Toys “R” Us. These young stores gave their lives. And so did Brookstone. Brookstone who loved massage chairs.
And so, Theodore Brookstone Karabotsos, in accordance with what we think your bankruptcy wishes might have been, we commit the following bulleted list of overpriced, dumb, and yet delightfully fun gadgets to archives of the internet.
- Those many, many lovely massage chairs.
- These limited edition Ariana Grande cat ear headphones.
- This pair of $350 night-vision ghost-hunting binoculars, last seen on sale for 17% off.
- This pair of even more expensive, more powerful night-vision, ghost-hunting binoculars.
- These wireless speakers shaped like the crying, heart-eyes, devil, and poop emoji.
- This Bluetooth beanie with built-in headphones.
- The same Bluetooth beanie but with a faux fur pom-pom on it.
- This portable light up karaoke machine.
Image credit: Wikimedia Commons.